Internet Dating -Personal Ads Scams-How to avoid getting scammed

March 31, 2010 by Linda Lee
Filed under Internet Dating Scams, Recent Posts

Since the 1980’s one scam has raked in billions of dollars from it’s victims.

It goes by many names but is most widely known as the Nigerian Scam.
This scam has moved from postal mail to faxes, unto today’s incarnation using email.

The basic premise of this scam is you are contacted by someone who needs money advanced to them, but the hook is, you will get a huge return back, since it is only temporary until their millions are freed up. This scam always plays out to be a large convoluted story involving lawyers, family and some catastrophic situation like death of a family member who somehow seemed to have left a large fortune they just cannot access at this time..

Common Names for this scam are:

4-1-9 (former name of penal code for this scam in Nigeria)
Advance Fee Fraud
Nigerian Letter
Romance/Dating Scam

There are so many variations on this scam it is impossible to keep track.

The latest twist, is targeting Internet Dating Sites where they prey on innocent people looking for companionship online.

A typical Internet dating scam goes like this:

Someone contacts you through the dating site you are registered on.

They have a profile with photos (not real) and you respond.

You have a few emails back and forth and they gain your trust a bit.

At some point they will ask you for money.

The con artist may claim to be interested in meeting you, but needs cash to book a plane, hotel room, or other expenses.

You send the money , always using either Western Union or a Money Order.

The victim keeps getting strung along and eventually realizes they have been had when the con artist never shows up or just stops communication..

Here are some of the typical things you will hear from the con artist.

“My parent, (Dad or Mum) is sick in the hospital”
“ I just need some money or plane fare to fly out and see you.”

“ I need an operation.”

“My family had millions of dollars, they will get it released soon, I need money to use now and will pay you back.”

“My whole family died, and I am alone and want to move to the United States and be with you, send money.”

“I have a daughter/son and sick parent, must leave the country fast, need money.”
“I need money to buy a phone and phone you.”

How to tell if you are being scammed.

NEVER pay anything up front for ANY reason.
NEVER send money.

Any request for money
Anything that involves sending money to Nigeria.
Wants money sent using Western Union –Never send anyone money using Western Union.
Asks for Money Orders
Overdone flowery words: Dear I be loving you, you are sweet ,precious dear, etc..
Usually lots of “dears” in there.
Wants any bank information from you of any kind.
Bad spelling
Bad Grammar
To much sickly sweet talk, and over the top romantic ideas
Will not answer your direct questions
Does not have any more photos of themselves for you to see.
Will not give you a phone number, (though beware, some people have gotten phone numbers and talked to someone, but were still ripped off.)
Insist on talking to you through email or IM, not the phone
Uses bad grammar, spelling and speaks like a British Baron from the 19th Century. Uses British words like Mum, and odd formal language.
They ALWAYS have a dead person in their story, dead parent, wife, child, you name it.

One easy way to find out if you are in a scam is to do an Internet Search.

Internet dating scammers often used the same names, family details and cover stories in multiple dating scams. Therefore, you may be able to expose a scam by conducting Internet searches on the names used by the scammers or key phrases from their emails an even the email address itself..

There is no one single Internet Dating site being targeted.

Yahoo Personals

Match.com

All faith based dating sites seem to be getting hit heavily due to a higher level of trust
that the participants will show a fellow single.

To read recent stories by people who have fallen prey to this dating scam go to

SmartWomenStupidComputers.com/blog

What to do if you have been scammed.

You will not get your money back.

I am very sorry to tell you this, but there is nothing the police or FBI can do.

You should still report it to both places.

If you sent money using Western Union, report it to them.

They cannot get your money back, but they need to know.