Internet Dating -Personal Ads Scams-How to avoid getting scammed
March 31, 2010 by Linda Lee
Filed under Internet Dating Scams, Recent Posts
Since the 1980’s one scam has raked in billions of dollars from it’s victims.
It goes by many names but is most widely known as the Nigerian Scam.
This scam has moved from postal mail to faxes, unto today’s incarnation using email.
The basic premise of this scam is you are contacted by someone who needs money advanced to them, but the hook is, you will get a huge return back, since it is only temporary until their millions are freed up. This scam always plays out to be a large convoluted story involving lawyers, family and some catastrophic situation like death of a family member who somehow seemed to have left a large fortune they just cannot access at this time..
Common Names for this scam are:
- 4-1-9 (former name of penal code for this scam in Nigeria)
- Advance Fee Fraud
- Nigerian Letter
- Romance/Dating Scam
There are so many variations on this scam it is impossible to keep track.
The latest twist, is targeting Internet Dating Sites where they prey on innocent people looking for companionship online.
A typical Internet dating scam goes like this:
Someone contacts you through the dating site you are registered on.
They have a profile with photos (not real) and you respond.
You have a few emails back and forth and they gain your trust a bit.
At some point they will ask you for money.
The con artist may claim to be interested in meeting you, but needs cash to book a plane, hotel room, or other expenses.
You send the money , always using either Western Union or a Money Order.
The victim keeps getting strung along and eventually realizes they have been had when the con artist never shows up or just stops communication..
Here are some of the typical things you will hear from the con artist.
“My parent, (Dad or Mum) is sick in the hospital”
“ I just need some money or plane fare to fly out and see you.”
“ I need an operation.”
“My family had millions of dollars, they will get it released soon, I need money to use now and will pay you back.”
“My whole family died, and I am alone and want to move to the United States and be with you, send money.”
“I have a daughter/son and sick parent, must leave the country fast, need money.”
“I need money to buy a phone and phone you.”
How to tell if you are being scammed.
NEVER pay anything up front for ANY reason.
NEVER send money.
- Any request for money
- Anything that involves sending money to Nigeria.
- Wants money sent using Western Union –Never send anyone money using Western Union.
- Asks for Money Orders
- Overdone flowery words: Dear I be loving you, you are sweet ,precious dear, etc..
Usually lots of “dears” in there. - Wants any bank information from you of any kind.
- Bad spelling
- Bad Grammar
- To much sickly sweet talk, and over the top romantic ideas
- Will not answer your direct questions
- Does not have any more photos of themselves for you to see.
- Will not give you a phone number, (though beware, some people have gotten phone numbers and talked to someone, but were still ripped off.)
- Insist on talking to you through email or IM, not the phone
- Uses bad grammar, spelling and speaks like a British Baron from the 19th Century. Uses British words like Mum, and odd formal language.
- They ALWAYS have a dead person in their story, dead parent, wife, child, you name it.
One easy way to find out if you are in a scam is to do an Internet Search.
Internet dating scammers often used the same names, family details and cover stories in multiple dating scams. Therefore, you may be able to expose a scam by conducting Internet searches on the names used by the scammers or key phrases from their emails an even the email address itself..
There is no one single Internet Dating site being targeted.
Yahoo Personals
Match.com
All faith based dating sites seem to be getting hit heavily due to a higher level of trust
that the participants will show a fellow single.
To read recent stories by people who have fallen prey to this dating scam go to
SmartWomenStupidComputers.com/blog
What to do if you have been scammed.
You will not get your money back.
I am very sorry to tell you this, but there is nothing the police or FBI can do.
You should still report it to both places.
If you sent money using Western Union, report it to them.
They cannot get your money back, but they need to know.
Warn other people, share your story, share it online and help educate others so they won’t fall prey to these scams and scammers.
The best prevention in the case of any of the Advance Fee, or Nigeria Scam is to already know about them and how they operate
As long as people keep falling for these scams they will be around.
Spread the word and help those you know not to fall for this scam.
any of these scams. There are many variations on the basic scam and the one thing you need to know is they all involve sending money to someone.
Never send money to a stranger.
Resources to report fraud and learn more.
Secret Service
Secret Service Nigeria Scam Page
FBI
Fraud Aid
List of Internet Scams –Justice Department
Justice Department actually catches some scammers
and they go to jail.
http://www.justice.gov/opa/pr/2009/April/09-crm-304.html
Excellent Article by Salon.com
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mary, how do you get the army to check someone out to see if they’re still active?
There is a guy on POF. the pictures posted are not of him. He is very charming and will make you think you are the best thing that every happened to him. after he has won your heart. He then will ask for money for his sick child, and yes I am one of the ones who fell for it. I will not mention the amount because I am embarrassed. He now has blocked me and I cannot communicate with him any more. But now I am sure he is romanacing the next lady on his list. BEware. of Boyjock
Molly- You should email me directly to discuss this. The problem is the scammers take real people and info off the internet and use it on their fake profiles.
Also when you respond to comments online it best not to use all CAPS. That is considered shouting.
Please I am begging you here to remove the article “almost the mrs”I came across this site from a friend whose daughter checks for scammers for her friends. MY HUSBAND SGT, GEORGE IS IN THE UNITED STATES ARMY HE IS CURRENTLY SERVING IN IRAQ. HE IS THE MOST LOYAL LOVING MAN ANYONE COULD HOPE FOR,HE IS A LOVING HUSBAND AND WONDERFUL FATHER, WE HAVE BEEN MARRIED FOR TWENTY YEARS AND I WAS SHOCKED TO SEE SUCH VISIOUS LIES ABOUT HIM!HIS CAREER WILL BE QUESTIONED BY HIS SUPERIORS, PLEASE REMOVE THIS VICIOUS TALE. i AM BEGGING YOU AS A WIFE OF A U.S. SOLDIER WHOSE HAS MADE SACRIFICES FOR HIS OWN FAMILY TO BE WHERE HE HIS, THIS IS ALL LIES !! PLEASE REMOVE THIS PLEASE !
I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW JUST WHO POSTED THIS HORRIBLE LIE ???? THIS MAN IS MY HUSBAND AND HE IS IN THE UNITED STATES ARMY, I WANT THIS TAKEN DOWN IMMEDIATELY !!!!!!!
WHEW THANK THE LORD i REMEMBERED THIS SITE !!!!! THANK YOU, THANK YOU !!!
OMG HE’S HANDSOME AND I WAS SO INTO HIM HE ALMOST GOT A PAID AIRFARE FROM ME, HE IS HOT, HOT HOT. WOW.HE HAS A SON IN CANADA WITH HIS MOTHER, HE IS IN THE UNITED SATATES ARMY STATIONED IN IRAQ, HE GOES BY THE NAMES GEORGECOLLINS LOPEZ, COLLINS GEORGE LOPEZ HE IS SITTING ON THE GROUND IN A WHITE SHIRT ANS SLACKS ALSO HAS SOME ARMY PICS HE IS BEAUTIFUL BROWN EYES, DARK BROWN ALMOST BLACK HAIR HE GOES BY THE NAME COOL2CARE4U@ YAHOO. I ALMOST GAVE HIM ME,
Hello I have had people asking if I was the one who posted this letter……
MY REPLY I WAS NOT !!!!!!!!
HELLO i HAVE A SITUATION HERE, SOMEONE HACKED MY COMPUTER THE ABOVE COMMENT
WAS MADE BY ME !!!! i HAVE BEEN TALKING WITH MAJOR JAMES WAGNER AND HE IS LEGITIMATE, i EVEN HAD THE u.s. aRMY CHECK HIM OUT TO SEE IF HE WAS STILL ACTIVE AND HE IS. i AM GETTING ALL KINDS OF THINGS SAID BECAUSE PEOPLE THOUGHT i WROTE THAT. AND i DID NOT, i HAVE HAD ALL SORTS OF THINGS HAPPEN TO ME SINCE MY COMPUTER WAS VIOLATED, PLEASE HELP ME HERE
Major james thomas patrick wagner aka jameswag65,aka james patrick wagner is his name,handsome smooth talking,GOD fearing,loving thoughtful always concerned about your health,have you eaten today, falls endlessly in love with you will never leave you,you are all he has in his life,of course after his parents met with an untimely death and his spouse passed from breast cancer,he has a 15 year old son who is in Miami cared for by Grandparents,he ran from Afghanistan for love made it to the UK where he ran out of money and desperately want to come directly to you, and then after a fashion want to go to Palo Alto Calif. maybe even New York,N.Y he said he’s 45 or 54 is profiled on facebook, just terminated from MySpace, I hope this man is caught and they throw him where the devil is, he calls and you can’t understand him, his profile is exactly like the nigerian letter format, too bad I thought he was wonderful until he asked for money and being a soldier in the United States Army wow, and to think he ran from there to be with me. LOL ! he is charming,remembers everything you say and asks the right questions and said the most romantic things right at the right time, he is a dangerous man, and I intend to post his picture on every website possible, he took advantage of me(I’m disabled) and I want him to pay dearly for his actions. so Ladies beware and stay safe,his words will melt your heart and you’ll think he is for real,but he is the biggest scammer and the most dangerous one. take care.